Sunday, July 19, 2009
Oh NO! Not COMMANDO!!!!
Isn't that against employment protocol?
I really hope my husband's whites... um that would be undershirts and underwear and a couple of ...well they were gray sweat shirts... haven't become all holey and I don't mean holy as in blessed... or basically turned into bare, disintegrating threads. !!
At approximately 1p.m. ... I threw my husband's whites in the washer. When it gets to the last few minutes of agitation... I add bleach. Now... in all my years of doing laundry... I have never quite mastered the art of bleaching. If there a bleach dispenser on the machine... never found one. I am the dispenser. Basically...I bleach like I cook... and just like I cook (tonight will be one such night), I go solo... depart from any form of instruction and just add a pinch of this and a little of that... and it usually tastes real good. You develop a knack for such things... says me.
But , admittedly... I am still not so sure with the bleach. Yes.. I've read the directions, mixed with water and listened to people who tell me they only use Clorox for colors..or hang the clothes out in the sun... which is a natural whitener. On that last point...have you been to NJ this summer? There has virtually been no sun and so that negates the last point.
Only a few of times did I overdo the bleach and put some holes in his whites and that's not a bad track record for 33 years.
Your thinking..well after 33 yrs... you should KNOW how to bleach.
But it BORES me.
Bleach is boring.
Evidently in more ways then one and hopefully today's bleach... didn't do the physical kind of boring.
I am much happier with a little splash here and a bigger splash there and hope for the best. I have ...at times... been concerned upon reentering the wash area and discovering that I would prefer not to inhale the chlorinated air caused by the emanating bleach fumes from the wash... but even then... his whites have been in tact. Suffice it to know... that on those laundry whites days... I would not want to spray any ammonia products in said area because I am certain my next words uttered would be, "Hello...Poison control?"
Oh..so I began this process at about 13:00 this afternoon.
I leave the lid up so that if I get distracted...all the water won't drain out as the washer completes it's cycle. Then I go back and reset it for the last few minutes and while agitating, pour in the bleach..um splash here and there... and I hope for the best...that the bleach doesn't actually settle onto the clothing but mixes quickly with the water.
And so that is what I did today.
After that I blogged a tiny bit but then spent the afternoon floating in the pool, reading another blogger's book that I am just loving (that will be another post) and hoping to get some sun.
Ha! Remember what I said about no summer sun in NJ this year? The sun decided to play peek-a-boo with me and unfortunately for me... I got more peek-a than boo! So being wet... I got cold. I tried to fall asleep because than I wouldn't know I was cold but I'd be rested... but gave up on that and so got out and tried to warm up on the deck and read there. Once I wrapped myself in a towel... I did warm up because then the sun came out and I fell asleep all toasty and comfy with a breeze blowing.
I woke up feeling refreshed from my little nap, picked some herbs... (basil and Greek oregano) for tonight's garden zucchini casserole and then went around front to weed a little.
Then at about 4:30, I walked back in the house and almost past the washer... until much to my dismay... I observed ...I had left the lid up...which meant it never drained and so for about 3 1/4 hours... his whites and gray sweatshirts...sat..soaking in the bleach water. Now the upside is that I didn't smell the bleach in the area and so perhaps this time... it was not enough... even though soaking, to riddle his clothes with Swiss cheese like holes... or even worse... disintegrate them.
Well maybe disintegration would be better because...well... "What happened to your underwear? Your t-shirts? Hmmmm... you say there are only threads of white material in the machine? Gosh!? I don't know...? Do you think something is wrong with the washer? Oh! Do we need a NEW one?" :)
But if he sees the Swiss cheese holes in his shirts and underwear... he'll know... the bleach bandit struck again.
I am pretty certain he's not willing to go commando to work in the morning. Well.. he wouldn't go commando anywhere. And do you think t-shirt Swiss cheese holes will show up through his top shirt?
So... how late is Walmart open on a Sunday night?
And now... I am going to go check out the damage. Hopefully..they'll just be so bright..he'll need sunglasses to get dressed and that will be it. Or else... tomorrow morning... he'll open his high boy to a freshly stacked pile of new under clothes... and at least they won't need bleach for a while. :)
*** 7:19 pm update - SHEER..would be the operative word. Fortunately..there is that extra panel in the front of the briefs. No Swiss cheese holes in the underwear or t-shirts. The whites are VERY white.
The sweat shirts are lighter..but still gray and no holes..although one has bleach spots. Eh... it's old anyway!
The underwear and shirts felt weird though and so I added extra bounce to soften more... and so he'll go to work in manly very white whites that are sheer and softer.
Gee... that kind of sounds like lingerie! ;)
I'll get him some new ones tomorrow.