Saturday, December 5, 2009
Operation "Le Boeuf du Jour" :)
A girl's gotta do...what a girl's gotta do!
In a previous post I mentioned that Mr SeaSpray is not Mr Christmas. He's not. But he always helps me with cooking, cleaning and errands when I need it because company is coming. And he's great about getting things down from the attic and putting them up there.
That being said ...he is perfectly content to let me do the shopping for presents and wrapping, write out the cards, baking and do all the decorating ..inside and out ..which I enjoy doing. I enjoy all of it. Well I do ...providing I find the right presents, am not up until 3 am on Christmas eve wrapping the presents, cards get done and I don't burn anything and the lights work... then I enjoy it. :) However... he does one very important thing that I am perfectly content to let him do and that is put the Christmas tree in the stand...NOT a fun thing to do.
I am already reminding him when we will go buy the tree. Why... I must be mentioning it 3 times a day now. Still ..when the moment comes.. he will exclaim "WHAT?!! We're getting the tree NOW?!!!"
I think they call that selective hearing and/or selective amnesia. It hits Mr SeaSpray during the Christmas holiday. He suffers from Annual Resist Buying the Christmas Tree Disorder. (ARBCTD)
It's actually become a Christmas tradition with us after 34 years of marriage... his acting as if he heard we were getting the tree that day ..for the 1st time..like I blindsided him or something. He either deserves an Academy Award for his performance of shock, or he has ARBCTD ... caused by an annual malfunction in his brain which is triggered when he hears those two little words ... Christmas Tree... and I think it's the latter. :)
I wrote about this previously ..but I am again going to attempt to sedate Mr SeaSpray ..hopefully rendering him totally compliant regarding going out to get the tree. I will do this by cooking up the most succulent pot roast I can make. Tilt the lid a bit just before he comes in the door and let the beefy aroma assault his senses into total compliance. Then as he walks by ...I will lift said tilted lid so that his eyes can take in the carnivorous pleasure that awaits him ...after he has the tree up in the stand.
You have no idea what a carnivore this man is. They say a the way to man's heart is good cooking ..and I will just add that in Mr SeaSpray's case .. to his brain. You should see his expression when he takes in the appearance of the almost done to perfection boef du jour ..along with the tantalizing aroma wafting through the house. I'm really serious.
So ... that's the game plan anyway... assault Mr SeaSpray's carnivorous senses... sedating the the ARBCTD trigger..thus enabling the SeaSpray's to leave the house gleefully on their quest for the perfect Christmas tree.
Obviously the aroma will fade but I have a plan for that. I am going to sprinkle a bit of le boeuf du jour pan drippings onto my shoulders and behind my ears and make sure I am up wind of Mr SeaSpray. I hope it's breezy! And I hope there aren't any loose dogs arounf ..or bears. But to seal the deal ..so to speak... I am cooking the roast with a cheese cloth over the pot, kept in place by the lid. Before he sees the roast..I will remove said cloth and place it in a sealed Ziploc bag. Then at the first sign of lack of Christmas spirit as he dances each of the 40 ten foot trees in the lot around for me to compare... I will remove the beef scented cheesecloth and wave it into the air behind his head. I'll have to play that by ear... ha ha or wave it by ear. ;) Also..I will remind him of just how tender that succulent roast is going to be. "Honey ..I know this is the tenth tree we've looked at and theres oh ..maybe 30 more, but BOY that ROAST is sure gonna taste gooooood... and s-o-o-o tender too. Mmm... That's it ..take that out too ..your so strong the way you twirl it around... did you see how good the pan drippings looked ..gonna make a delicious brown gravy."
Okay ..you all know I'm teasing about the cheesecloth ..right? Oh and the drippings behind my ears too..of course.
But admittedly ... I'm not above reminding Mr SeaSpray about the succulent le boeuf du jour that awaits him at home ...once we (he) gets the Christmas tree set up. ;)
T'is the season to be jolly ... fa la la la la la la la la!
*If curious ...here are a some posts that explain why I have concocted such an elaborate plan...Operation "Le Boeuf du Jour" ... to facilitate a cheery Filled with Christmas Spirit Mr SeaSpray while searching for the perfect Christmas tree. :)
Timing is everything. ;)
O Tannenbaum - Post 1
Post In Between The Tannebaums (SHOCKED?)
O Tannenbaum Post 2
O Tannenbaum Post 3