Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Standing, Talking, Cold, Wet and NEKKID!!
This post was inspired by StorytellERdoc's current post. I realized that my increasingly lengthy comment could be a post and so here it is. Thanks for the inspiration Jim! :)
When I was 25, I once had to talk with someone ...a doctor ...while standing nekkid and I was cold too. Not only was I cold ..but I was wet ..dripping wet. I also felt like a Sumo wrestler ..female version ..because I had recently given birth to our 1st son via c-section and it was the first time I was able to take a shower.
The nurse had covered my still swollen belly with plastic taped onto me because I had the vertical c-section incision (up toward my navel) that needed to be protected. That was the *only* covering I had, if you could call it that because even the plastic was transparent! My head! My head was covered by hair. That was my only covering because even Bajingoland had been shaved in the prep. I'm just sayin. I don't know how they prep women today ..but in 1980 they shaved me everywhere... well okay it was my stomach ..in case I had a C-section.
I was actually scared my little light soft feminine hair would come in all virile from shaving and I'd be hairy ..seriously SASQUATCH HAIRY when it grew back! Oh and what nurse with any common sense says to a very pregnant woman in labor ...with strong hormones coursing through her body .."You're a HAIRY lady!"? In retrospect ..maybe she had a secret death wish. ? And for the record ..I didn't turn into a HAIRY SASQUATCH. So loose that image please. Thank you very much! :)
It was on a Wednesday morning ...August 20th, 1980, to be exact... when I decided I was up to taking my first shower after the c-section. I went in right after breakfast. I had no sooner stepped out of the shower ...when the bathroom door opened and much to my surprise and dismay ...there was my son's pediatrician. He was on his morning rounds and his morning rounds brought him to me, standing in the doorway. He didn't say "Excuse me ..I''ll give you a minute." and back out closing the door for me. And I didn't even shriek or ask him to leave, asking him for a minute to get covered up. My robe was on the back of the door ..that he was now holding open!
This was the first time I met him. What a first impression ..nekkid ...specifically ... dripping wet ..cold ..nekkid, sporting only the see through plastic on my swollen sumo wrestler belly. I'm a friendly hand shake kind of girl ..always was ..but we didn't shake hands that morning. I assume it was because I was wet and/or nekkid. Given the circumstances ..while I listened attentively (new mom trying to soak everything up - no pun intended), I wasn't my usual congenial self. I did converse ..but I really was the proverbial deer in the headlights physically and emotionally had a dual dialog of mortification going on in my head. Funny how our brains can do that. You hear and converse with the other person ..but under stress, there is this whole other conversation with images going on in your head... at least it works that way for me anyway.
I didn't know what to do and so I stood there talking with him ..too shy ..okay definitely MORTIFIED ... and too deep into freeze mode (emotionally and physically/temperature wise) to even grab the towel.. or ask to get my robe behind the door.
I just stood there ... looking up at him while conversing with him about our new son. It was humiliating and awkward and I was wondering what he was thinking. Perhaps he was in a rush and just trying to get rounds finished. Or perhaps once he was already in ..he figured he should just commit to the conversation. Also ..maybe for him ..he was used to being around the nekkid new mothers and so for him it was just shop.
However ...he really should have been more sensitive to my feelings and right to privacy. I don't think back in 1980, medical people thought in terms of right to privacy anywhere near as much as they do today. But common sense should've kicked in. Maybe he thought that since I didn't say anything it was alright. It wasn't though.
I never imagined my son's pediatrician would see me nekkid ..that is for sure. And actually, he was very nice and turned out to be my favorite doctor in that group.
But let me tell you ..standing ..talking ...while cold, dripping wet and NEKKID with a post c-section swollen, Sumo wrestler, shaved, plastic covered taped belly opposite someone of the opposite sex ..that you are meeting for the first time ...even if he is a doctor ..is not exactly the best way to start out your day. I'm just sayin. :)
(Not like the 2nd, 3rd or 10th time would be any better :)