Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Venting a Bit

http://www.goireland.com/Location-Photos/1601_1700/Louisburgh-1659.jpg

Feeling down.

Company coming for a nice corn beef with all the fixins dinner. About to put the Irish soda bread in the oven.

been listening to Celtic music all day.

Delightful ..but bittersweet. Almost lost it with Danny Boy. Then I remembered one of our Irish ED docs singing Danny Boy a capella at a good bye dinner for one of the staff and smiled at that memory. . He has an amazing voice and with the Irish accent ..perfect. have it on tape. :)

Listening to Pandora.com ..I created what I named Celtic music and so many wonderful selections are coming up.

Bittersweet because I am missing Mom. I am using a table cloth that had been her mother's from Scotland ..to sort of have her present at the table. She always liked the traditional Corn beef dinner. :)

I feel like I can't post anything to save my life and you wouldn't believe how much I've written and pulled or not posted. I guess .. I just have to roll with it.

Anyway ..family doesn't know I am feeling down and so it's our secret. Shhh ..just you and the world. Just needed to vent.

And ..I'll perk up with the baby and family here.

For those of you celebrating .. I hope you are enjoying your day..well I hope you all are. :)

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.

May God be with you and bless you:
May you see your children's children.
May you be poor in misfortune,
Rich in blessings.
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward.

May the road rise up to meet you
May the wind be always at your back
May the warm rays of sun fall upon your home
And may the hand of a friend always be near.

May green be the grass you walk on,
May blue be the skies above you,
May pure be the joys that surround you,
May true be the hearts that love you.

9 comments:

StorytellERdoc said...

Beautiful post. If this is the result of writing and pulling much, you did it just right. My mother, too, was Irish and she is missed immensely on this day of memories--abundant, ethnic foods and family swelling out of the dining room and kitchen doorways. Sigh...

Hope your dinner and food were delicious--oh, and no stains on Mom's tablecloth!

Chrysalis Angel said...

Sea, I hope you are feeling better today.

We've had a death in the family and will be dealing with that for the next couple of days. I'd rather look on the good memories and relinquish the pain of loss.

I know we must feel it, go through it, and get to that place we can move from it. Notice, I didn't say move on from it, because you will always carry them in your heart and you will miss them. I mean being able to move forward and start to release the grip of that paralyzing sense of loss.

Think on how you would feel if you were gone and looking on...if you were happy and well again, would you want them to suffer or would you want them to talk to you and still have a laugh? Lord knows with you, there will be some antic they will be watching you get yourself into. ;)

A big hug, Spray. I'll be back over to check in, in a couple days.

SeaSpray said...

Thank you Jim. I'm sorry about your Mom. I know you miss her. What wonderful memories you have! It is sad ..but I know a part of life that people die.

My husband had a very large family of aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. and still way larger than mine..but everyone is spread out now and so not like it used to be.

When I was in my 20s ..sometimes I did not want to go to family events ..but wanted to do my own thing. Now ..the great aunts/uncles have all died off and so has most of the next generation. And it's weird when you are the one that becomes the adult ..head of the family.

I don't want to grow up! I want to look to someone else. :)

Yes ..dinner was delicious. Going to have rubin sandwiches with the leftover corn beef. :)

SeaSpray said...

I am feeling better Angel. I'm so sorry you've lost a loved one. I hope you are alright. E-mail me when you have a chance. If you feel like talking ..call me.

Yes ..you are right about them being in a better place and certainly would want us to be happy.

I was reading C.S. Lewis (grieving over his wife)last night where he discussed wanting his deceased wife to be alive again. And then questioning would it be fair to her now that she is in a better place and then to have to die all over again?

The anniversary of her death is coming up ..April 17th and so no doubt that is lurking around in my mind. But as a Christian ..I should focus on the joy and promises.

Take care Angel and a warm hug back to you. :)

passionstamper said...

Hey Sea, I'm just getting back to checking mail and trying to catch up on with everything I've missed since my mom got sick, and now with stamp classes starting up again, I've been so darn busy. Mike left this morning and I'm missing him too, after our talk yesterday. I'm sorry I've been pre-occupied lately with so many other family issues that I've been distracted from the pain you must have been feeling on St. Patty's day. Thanks for being a friend to me lately. I'm blessed to have a friend like you. Love ya, Deb

passionstamper said...

Seaspray, hope you don't mind me passing along a note to Crysalis here-I'm so sorry for your loss...may God fill you with his love and compassion and may memories of your loved one get you through this difficult time. I love your viewpoint of our loved ones who pass on and would they want us to suffer-or would they want us to remember them and the good times and share a laugh..may you remember the good times of your loved one and share that laugh Angel...after you get beyond the time of grieving. Hugs, Deb

Chrysalis Angel said...

Thank you, PS. Thank you too, Seaspray.

PS I hope things are better with your situation.

SeaSpray said...

Hi PS - I'm fine and we did talk.. but thank you. I'm glad you and Mike conversed and he will be missed. I'm sure he's excited about getting set up in his apt. :)

I think it's great you and Angel have become friends. Chat away. :)

I hope you are doing alright Angel.

{{{Angel}}}

Chrysalis Angel said...

Thank you again, Seaspray.