Monday, October 25, 2010

35 Years Ago...

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Wow! Thirty Five years married ...35.

We were married on a rainy, Saturday afternoon. October 25th, 1975 at 2pm at the First Presbyterian Church of Franklin ..the church my husband grew up in be exact.

Well actually was supposed to be at 2pm and everyone was waiting ...and waiting ..and waiting. Mr SeaSpray and the ushers were up front at the alter. The guests were all seated. Everyone was waiting ...I am guessing ...wondering where I was....

I was disappointed it was so gloomy and rainy... but I was so excited and happy ...filled with expectant anticipation. Others were nervous and I was not. Not even an ounce of nervousness. Just looking forward to the great day ahead.

While I was getting my hair done, the beautician told me it was good luck if it rained on my wedding day. I still would've taken my chances with the sunshine though. Although I liked the thought. :)

And it was pouring when we had to leave and I had a satin dress and so spots showed. My Aunt Janet told me not to sit on my dress.

So we were all inside, before 2pm.

We were all there. My Aunt and Uncle and the bridesmaids.

My life long friend , since I was four and she was five ...Iris, was my matron of honor. I had been her maid of honor the previous year. My cousin Lee, and friend Joyce were my bridesmaids. My Uncle Hector was giving me away. He was Lee's father. He and Aunt Janet took me into their home to live when I was 14. They gave me a wonderful home life. They gave me our wedding.

So we were all standing there and I was as happy as could be and as cool as a cucumber. No nervousness whatsoever.

And then Aunt Janet yelled at me. "PATRICIA! I TOLD you NOT to sit on your wedding dress. It's all WRINKLED now!"

Then I cried. Fortunately, my tears were brief. I was just wanting to walk down the aisle ...but there we stood ... for what seemed an eternity. I think it was 10- 15 minutes past the hour and my aunt and uncle were getting annoyed. Then ...finally uncle opened the vestibule door to see what the hold up was. The little old man, that worked for the church ...forgot to open the vestibule doors. Or was it that my uncle ...or someone should've thought to open them just a crack let the little old man know we were all there ...ready and waiting? And we did have a wedding rehearsal the night before, but I don't recall that end of it. Evidently none of us did. :)

I felt exhilarated while walking down the aisle and I remember all the smiling faces ...but most of all ...I remember Mr SeaSpray. :) He later told me he thought I was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. I was only 20 and he was 24. We had dated 3 years to the month and then there we were ...sharing our wedding day. :)

They say something always goes wrong at a wedding ...even though you plan. My bridal bouquet was supposed to be trailing a bit more and was shorter than I had picked out. My cousin's basket was filled too high and when she shifted while standing ..the water leaked out onto the floor. An our neighbors had a car accident on the way to the reception. Thankfully they were alright, but never made it up to the reception.

I was so disappointed to learn that the free lance photographer only had 7 wedding pictures to present to us for our photo album. 7! It turned out that the synchronization of his flash was off and the pictures didn't turn out and the color was off in some of the pictures he did have.

Other people that took pictures gave us copies, but oddly many of them had problems with their cameras. Ha ha! I guess we broke the cameras!

I just found these very small, poor quality pictures in a drawer while organizing on Sunday and thought I'd share them. They blurred with enlargement.

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Mr SeaSpray's mother standing next to me and his grandmother next to him.

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Our first dance was to the song by Chicago, "Color My World" and the lyrics are as follows:

As time goes on
I realize
Just what you mean
To me
And now
Now that you're near
Promise your love
That I've waited to share
And dreams
Of our moments together
Color my world with hope of loving you

It wasn't my favorite song, but was popular at the time. The idea actually came from a coworker. I would've chosen something different for sure ... if I had known the band only played instrumental music.

Anyone familiar with the song, knows how repetitive the music is ..over and over again...and dancing to that seemed so monotonous. It just was not the song to choose without the lyrics being sung. My Aunt and Uncle chose the band because one of the guy's parents was friends with the family. His parents and my mother and Aunt and Uncles all knew each other from childhood and so it was a given his band would be picked. And they were good ...except they didn't sing. Actually ..he paid his way through med school playing in that band and became an Obstetrician in a larger hospital not far from here. I didn't know him well, but had always liked him when we met at family barbecues. And they did a great job at our wedding. It was a fun night.

We had our reception in the Glen Brook Inn, up in Wantage. It was a rustic restaurant, lots of wood and cathedral ceilings and it was a popular place with weddings at the time, but not as expensive as Perona Farms and some other places. And I just LOVED that the bridal party table was located right in front of the large windows taking up almost the entire back wall, from which we could see the fall foliage, mixed with pine and cedar trees and especially the beautiful brook coursing through the rocks at the base of the mountain. It was beautiful ...creating the perfect setting for our fall wedding reception. And there were lights illuminating the brook at night.

The ambiance was warm and cozy for a chilly fall night. Good food, sharing our joy with family and friends and lots of dancing. And my Uncle Jim seemed to take special delight in clanking his utensil on the glasses ...just as we had a mouth full of food. He had that impish grin every time ...knowing we'd have to rush to finish the food so we could kiss while every one joined in and watched us. My mother always said I was a tease like my Uncle Jim. She was right. I definitely have some of his genes in me. :)

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Encouraged by our guests and Uncle Jim's genes, I intentionally shoved a big piece of cake in Mr SeaSpray's mouth. ;)
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Mr SeaSpray on the other hand was gentle about it. :)


Mr SeaSpray's aunt an uncle stopped at our houses so we could change out of our wedding attire, before heading to Newark to catch a plane. Just as we got into the car when leaving his house ...his little 7 year old cousin, Jackie ... no doubt prompted by his uncle ... hollered out, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" Funny! Obviously he didn't know what he was saying. :)

We honeymooned in Paradise Island, Bahamas.

We didn't stay in the fancy hotel on the Island, but in a small motel ..The Beach Inn. It was pretty. My favorite thing about the motel was that our room had large sliding doors that opened up to white sand, palm and casuarina trees, our own little beach hut away from the sun and a view of the ocean. It was amazing to step outside our door and have all of this as our back yard. We practically had the beach to ourselves all week. Most people were located closer to the outdoor bar and restaurant. I loved the French cuisine at night. :)

About mid week there was a hurricane in the area and so we did have a couple of days of winds, rain and rough water. But the rough water was more exciting and we could body surf better. The rain didn't bother us since we were already wet from swimming. :) Now ...I would never go in water like that because I know there could be strong currents caused by the storm system, that could drag a person out to sea. Ignorance is bliss.

The movie Jaws had just come out 2 months earlier and I admit that it did unnerve me a bit and I did think about it when I was in the water I am sure many ocean swimmers did at the time. :)

There was so much to do, including going into Nassau. We had so much fun. It was the perfect honeymoon location for a SeaSpray. :)

And I checked with Mr SeaSpray to see if I could say the following and he was alright with it.

Last ...but not least. Mr SeaSpray and I had some real rocky times in our marriage and it was hanging by a thread for many years. We are living proof that you can work through your problems and come out even better on the other side of the storm. Thank God we did. :)

We are still very opposite in personality. We will sometimes see things so differently's astounding. :) And we still have our same crazy making traits for each other. But I say that with love. He would agree. I think with maturity ...we've become more accepting and definitely more appreciative. And it sounds cliche to say ...but when you experience loss of loved ones, health and other challenges wakes you up to what is most important and you can come through stronger and appreciative of the good things. And maybe that is the key ...APPRECIATE the good things. And even though we have definite differences in personality ...we do share the same core values, i.e. family, faith in God and other things important to us as a couple. And ...we also have our separate times ...where we do our own thing. And we communicate better than when we were newly weds.

We have two wonderful sons and a dear d-i-l. Older son and his wife have blessed our family with two beautiful girls and a baby boy on the way. The perfect Christmas present! :)

I have also been blessed to be a part of his family. They are my family too. I always joked that marrying into his family was like marrying in to the Waltons, so large and loving. :)

* I wish I had time to pull out some other pictures. Of course blogger's remorse may cause me to take all of them down. :)

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