Sunday, January 31, 2010

OOPS!

My apologies to anyone who may have followed the link in my previous post. I initially put it up because I was laughing out loud at some of the things this guy said regarding circumcision.. but I was sleepy and it was late. After just going in to reread it ..I realize there are things in the post ...I would NOT want to have this blog connected too... including the comments. I appreciated the humor and that's what caused me to link.

I'm sorry and hope I didn't offend anyone because that isn't my normal reading material. Like I said in the previous post ...one big brain.

One Big Brain

I am doing well post-op and will be back soon to describe my experience at the surgical center and home post-op, as well as whether or not my SeaSpray stent removal theory is correct.

But for now ... I was looking up lipstick pictures and then stumbled onto an article about kissing and of course everyone knows that girls just have to read an article about kissing and then that led to an article about men's opinions of women regarding various topics ...and everyone knows that of course women just have to know what men are really thinking about them .. and then ...I guess because I was reading about men's opinions of us ..we women that is ..that somehow (the male connection ..I guess) led to funny post (that I did link to and then upon reading it for a second time(just now) and not bleary eyed sleepy ..I realized "OOPS!" and so have disconnected from the link/post title because while there were some very funny parts ..um some other things that got by me ..well ..I would not want to link here.) Now of course I ...an inquisitive woman ..was wondering .."What did the woman do with it?" ..because I was reading all these articles on men and women and so assumed some woman did something to this poor guy's schwing- schwong or at the very least controlled it in some bizarro way and so ...I of course just had to know ..although was hopeful it wasn't a Bobbitt, which thankfully it was not ... and so I read it and laughed throughout this guy's post ..um ..not that there is anything funny about his or anyone else Schwing-schwong ..but apparently his pondering circumcision is... at least the way he writes about it. Boy ..that can be a controversial subject!

Then after I processed that post ... I began thinking about the internet and how all I wanted was to find a pretty picture of lipstick ..because of course ..we girls like lipstick ..this girl does for sure ..kind of tied into a sort of post-op surgical post and so.... I was pondering how the lipstick pictures led to the kissing, the kissing led to men's opinions ..and there were so many - one connected to the other and so on... and then to a hilarious circumcision post (I did laugh out loud ..but then it didn't activate a wince reflex in me either) and then to my pondering ..the Internet is like one big brain ..a woman's brain of course. That is because everyone knows how we women think ..it's all connected and we go on and on and on ..never ending in thought. Remember Mark Gungor's "Nothing Box" Men actually have a nothing box in their brain ..that they can go to and are you ready ..actually ..think about NOTHING! (Here is a funny post with video I wrote about the difference between the male vs female brain)

Nothing ..does not ever compute - connect in a woman's brain! I wish I could go to a nothing box. How do they do it ..the men ..go to a nothing box?

Seriously ..women simply cannot think of "nothing."

Therefore ..I have also concluded the Internet is a female entity. It makes sense ... to this female brain ..anyway. I'm just saying.

And now I am going to fill out the surgery center's survey on line. I'm giving them high marks and have good things to say. :) It's cool how you can respond on line.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

SeaSpray Stent Removal - Kidney Spasm Theory


Anaesthetic Knockouts

I will be KO'd tomorrow because I am getting my ureteral stent removed. I'm very happy about it and it will be a relief and I have plans for my new found freedom ..and ...I am also quite ambivalent about it ..but that is for another post.

So, I have to be in SDS by 7am... thank you urodoc. We discussed this and it will give me more time in post-op if needed because I sometimes have a very rough time with kidney spasms post stent removal and I have suffered horribly with nausea and vomiting when I am in the car on the way home and then by the time I get there ..it is horrendous.

To have kidney spasms with it too ..ugh... I am not looking forward to it.

But my current urologist has always managed this very well and so I usually get through it with minimal problems. I don't know why sometimes I do really well and breeze right out of post -op and other times ..shooting me would be a mercy killing.

However ..I don't know why ..but when a stent is taken out ..I am guaranteed to have serious kidney spasms.

I have a theory though.

I've noticed that when the 1st urologist just yanked the stents out in his office ..I had bad spasms... very bad spasms. Then when my current urologist removed a very small stent ..which actually felt good in a weird way because all I felt was this warm gush ..which was me trying to pee on the Doctor and his assistant ..but they'd obviously finessed the jump back while simultaneously exclaiming "WHOA!" from the flying pee move. You'd think they choreographed the move with their perfect split second timing. The "Uro Dance" where the lead dancer ...usually the urodoc ...swings a stent around while in perfect step with the partner they both jump backwards... exclaiming "Whoa!" ...repetitively. I have it on good authority that patients love it..quite entertaining. :) It great with the right music. But it's not authentic "Uro Dance unless flying pee with a gush is involved. I'm just sayin. ;)

Anyway ..even though the removal of said stent didn't hurt that day ..the kidney spasms sure did at home. I spent all afternoon and evening on the couch. Missed a Longaberger pool party too.

But I digress.

Interestingly ..and here is where the theory comes in to play ..the next time urodoc removed a stent in the clinic... it was done very slowly. I don't know why. Maybe because it was encrusted ..but I don't know if that is the case. Anyway ..there was a lot of stop-go, stop-go ..until it was all the way out. That wasn't too bad either. It did hurt...but nothing like when the 1st urologist just yanked them right out. Those two stent removals forever jaded me regarding stent removals.. even tho these other ones were good.

Well after that particular stent removal ..I had kidney spasms ..but not as bad as the other times. I had one done under anesthesia, they when I was in post-op with in the hour the pain was horrendous.. but fortunately SDS managed it acting on my urodoc's orders.

These spasms begin approximately an hour from when it is removed ..maybe a little longer. You would think it happens right away... but it doesn't. My theory is if you remove the stents quickly ..the kidney says "HUH? What was THAT? O-W-W!!!" as the stent is yanked out creating a shock vacuum force. Then after the shock of it all ..the kidney experiences separation anxiety after losing it's side kick of so many weeks or months without so much as an "Au revoir " and simply convulses in sadness... until it finally settles down again. It's the shock factor ..being shaken up with it's companion just flying right out of there .."INGRATE!".

On the other hand ..the stent that is gently coaxed out .. has time to tell the kidney .. "Hey thanks ..we were a great team .. it's been fun. Ha! Remember when she drank the raspberry cool aide? Turquoise is a good color for you. Too bad when it mixed with her next dose of Pyridium you turned all green after that. You take care now...Good-B-y-e-e-e-e." And then the kidney is somewhat saddened over the separation and so does spasm a bit but quickly settles down.

One stent removal creates the shock factor and major separation anxiety and the kidney spasms wildly. The other stent removal was amicable and they had the chance to say their Good-Byes and so the kidney spasms mildly because it still has settle itself because it does miss it's former companion and has to readjust to the emptiness for a bit before finding it's niche again.

Well that's the SeaSpray theory on how to avoid severe kidney spasms during ureteral stent removals. :)

* Okay ..I may have blogger's remorse over this post, Suffice it to know I'm a bit punchy ..but can't sleep. I never can the night before going into the OR.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Pay to Breathe? Hooka Bar?

http://humboldtherald.files.wordpress.com/2007/06/syrian_chiller_hookah.jpg

Let me tell you ..when a girl with a city accent at the salon tells someone she is going to a hooka bah, it gets your attention! I'm kidding ..she was a girl, but didn't have a city accent and thus I didn't really think she was going to a hooker bar.

I did see cheap hookahs advertised on the web though. The idea of getting cheap hookahs still makes me giggle. :)

Sorry ..just couldn't resist. ;)

She said she was going to a HOOKAH bar ..pronounced like Who ka... hoo like who and kah like bah. Now not whokabah.. cause that looks like it could be pronounced wok-a-bah ...but hookah bar. I'm just sayin.

"Okay ..this is different", I thought and so asked her what a hookah bah..I mean BAR ..was. She didn't know exactly, but that they were going on Saturday night ..down to a Hookah bar in Montclair. She said that you sit around a table and inhale oxygen or flavored smoke.

Pay to inhale oxygen? I don't know about that. I do that for FREE ..24/7! Is the oxygen better in Montclair? I mean ..we live in the mountains and Montclair is near the city .. New York City and Newark and more industry...I'm just sayin.

She said she thinks they put a canister on the table that has hoses and so everyone shares breathing the same oxygen.

Community oxygen?

Again... aren't we all doing that..sharing oxygen ..not just in Montclair ..but globally and for FREE ..24/7? But if anyone would benefit from that ..I can imagine the geriatric population in a nursing home congregating around the communal oxygen tank or a smokers club ..but not your average person.

She said it's a social thing. "Um ..yeah"..I'm thinking .."I'm pretty social around people so long as I am breathing." She also said that if you want to inhale smoke ..you can get flavored smoke ..like vanilla and I don't recall what other flavor.

No thank you ..I'd rather pay for air ..I mean oxygen.

So ..she went on to say that she heard the oxygen makes you very alert and you feel better.

Okay ..I LIKE that.

And at least no one will get stopped and arrested for a DWO .. Driving While Oxygenated. Can't hurt to have alert people driving on the road after leaving the Hookah Bar.

Actually ..the atmosphere in a Hookah bar ..if authentic middle eastern sounds interesting ..just wouldn't be into sharing a communal tank of anything ..and definitely not smoke.

I do love hummus though ..they serve hummus. Mmmm ... h-u-m-m-u-s. :)



Actually ..if you click on this picture it has information on oxygen bars. I have no idea whether these things are good for you or not.

The girl at the salon thought that if you want to smoke on a hookah that is in one room and if you want to breathe in oxygen ..that is in a separate room.

I'm thinking that after you smoke on a hookah ...you NEED an oxygen hookah. Yes?

"An oxygen bar is an establishment, or part of one, that sells oxygen for recreational use. Individual flavored scents may be added to enhance the experience."

I love it ..BREATHING for recreation! And that you pay for it too. ;)

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

This Gave me a Much Needed Laugh - "Mass Backwards"

The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Mass Backwards
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Political HumorHealth Care Crisis


Life has been a bit hard lately and I say that guardedly in view of the loss of life and destruction in Haiti. My stuff is minuscule by comparison. But ..even though a hangnail is little by comparison to other serious bodily ailments ..the hangnail still hurts ..a lot ..especially if twisted around a bit.

That being said ..it doesn't feel right to complain. My Aunt used to say "If you don't have something good to say ..then don't say anything at all." I try to live by that..especially when it comes to people. (except for politicians)

I will talk about something soon .. and yes it is one of the reasons I was quiet here. And so Angel ..you were right in wondering what was up with me based on how quiet my blog was. We are all well. Life gets complicated sometimes and sadness thrown in here and there and I just didn't have my blogging mojo I guess.

My stent will be coming out next week and so I will probably do a patient perspective story before that. If not soon, then I will afterward.

Ive noticed that whenever I say I am posting about something ..it's like I jinx the post and it sits in my drafts. Like "Bajinogland Olympics". I never did get that one up.

I am grateful for all the blessings I DO have in my life... and there are many..thank you God.

Anyway ..if you pay attention to politics ..you will love this Jon Stewart clip. I found it on Dr Schwab's "Cutting Through the Crap" political blog. Ha! If you are a conservative ..unless you you enjoy the sensation of having your blood boil after reading many of the posts and comments, and have thick skin ...it may not be the blog to read. That being said .. I am a conservative and still enjoy his writing and the comments (even though I usually disagree),however, I miss his writing in Surgeonsblog.

Jon Stewart did this the night before the MA election and it is HILARIOUS!!! I have been sad and worried about something - now resolved and I busted out laughing throughout this clip. I was hoping Brown would get in ..but I would've laughed just as hard if he didn't. There are so many good things in here ..but "I drive a truck" so funny. :) All of it. :)

So, I hope you watch it and laugh as much as I did. :)

Monday, January 18, 2010

Just Think ..I could be YOUR Random 03:30 ED Patient Tonight

http://i.ehow.com/images/GlobalPhoto/Articles/6982/thanksgivinggravy-main_Full.jpg

I burned the back of my throat a little while ago.

I was making the turkey gravy from the roast I made earlier (see previous post), which by the way ...turned out quite tasty ...if I say so myself. There is no rhyme or reason to my gravy making abilities. Sometimes I can and sometimes ..well suffice it to know ..I always make sure I have some fake back up jar gravy ..just in case.

I blame it on gravy confusion early in our marriage, but I digress.

Anyway ..I got a soup spoon to taste the gravy. It was steaming hot and so I blew on it but evidently not enough ... because when I swallowed... it burned the my tongue a little, but I guess because I really thought it was cool, I swallowed hard and fast and the bulk of it caught the back of my throat ... in front of my uvula ..maybe... or right by it. ??

So I quickly drank a glass of ice cold well water and gargled. I had ice cream and am back to drinking ice water again. Oh and I am slowly inhaling to let cooler air come into my throat.

I feel like I have a sore throat and it feels weird.

Okay ...so at the crux of my concern is I really do not want to be the ED patient that walks in to the Emergency department at 3:30 in the morning because she's afraid to go to sleep (If I can't sleep then why should the doctor sleep? ;), in case her throat closes up. That's where I'm going with this. Could that really happen? I would think it would've by now as it's already been a couple of hours. I just don't want to have to fall on a hollow pen or something to get air into an obstructed airway... is all I'm sayin. ;)

You know how much your tongue hurts when you burn it..well the throat is worse .. I am finding out. I just got the idea to maybe suck on some healing honey and let it drip down my throat. Maybe that will sooth it ..oh.. and I have some cold aloe juice. Also good idea. Aloe is healing.

I'm gonna be making Whizzie Winkles all night ..which I guess is a good thing because then at least I'll be awake.

Seriously ..if any one happens to see this ..is there anything I can do to feel better that I haven't mentioned here.

I'm thinking that just like when you put ice on a burn and then take it off .. the contrast of ice and regular room temp air makes it hurt more.. this is happening with all the cold stuff.

I really thought I cooled it off!
*************************************
My Aunt Janet always made enough gravy to feed an army out of the droppings from her big roasting pan. There were no flies on her ... she could make gravy out of anything... even socks I think. One day while showing me she said you NEVER put water in the pan. You just add flour and seasoning to the drippings, mixing them into a paste, heat and then add cold water as it thickens. Delicious!

Mr SeaSpray's grandmother (I watched her) also made volumes of gravy to feed the masses ..his large family. But she said she always adds water in the pan once the turkey is in and later makes a paste of flour and water and then adds that. Delicious!

Well ..I can make volumes too ..but it doesn't always taste good... and then sometimes it's so good ..like tonight and I could bottle it to sell. :)

*************************************************
Update: Well ..I survived the night and so I put the hollow pen away. ;) It's about 14 hours since I burned my throat and am drinking coffee now. It's just irritated but not burning now, hurts a bit more when I swallow.

What I wrote is an inside view of a potential ER patient's thinking processes when they are scared and is how they end up in ER's in the wee hours of the morning. Something is scaring them. And I know better and knew time would heal ..but those scary thoughts pop in. And anyone who works in a hospital will go out of their way to NOT go in as a patient and so if you do go or are considering it..something has to be really concerning you... as it was me. It really hurt!

To put it in perspective for how much I will avoid a hospital as a patient..when I first had the constricted ureter (didn't know it and thought it was a bladder infection), I actually had sepsis, pyelonephritis, etc and was having massive chills since I got home from working at the ED the night before and got antibiotics from the doc that was on that night. My husband wanted to take me and I kept saying the antibiotics just needed to work. I was also extremely nauseated ..vomiting a couple times...profoundly weak and the 3 sets of chills I had were to the bone and incapacitating so that I could do nothing but shake and be cold. Couldn't even dress or move. It wasn't until the 3rd set of chills, 104 temp and 124 pulse rate ..that I felt like and thought I might die ..that I waited too long, but didn't tell my family or call an ambulance, but just told them the 2nd night ..that I needed to go to the ER.

And this past summer when I fell off the stairs to my deck, landing flat on my back and as a result hurt everywhere, but it wasn't until 3 days later when every inhale hurt that I finally went to the ED.

So that I would even remotely entertain the thought of going to the ED last night shows just how much it hurt.

* Lesson learned: Never ever swallow steaming hot gravy. ;)

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Self Whopped by a Turkey (Okay -it Was Team Work ;)

http://www.backyardandbbq.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/jess-turkey.jpg
That's not my turkey, but it looks like a heart attack in a pan with all that butter..although I'm sure it's tasty.

Grrrr!

Suffice it to know that I am mentally flogging myself as I type and I'm doing it with a 13lb turkey. Whop! Whop! Whop! Stuffing is flying everywhere as the turkey makes contact with my body with each turkey whop to myself. I overstuffed it and also added a lot of onions and celery to the stuffing.

We'll be finding onion and celery pieces for weeks.

It's not easy to self whop yourself with a turkey .. especially when the sane part of you is causing you to duck and dodge your own self inflicted turkey whops. If I didn't ...the carnage would be much worse. I'm just sayin .. even if it is only in my imagination. ;)

I am pretty sure today's turkey debacle *is* the dumbest thing I've ever done in the kitchen. I mean ..I think so ..although I do have this haunting feeling there is something else.

Well then there is the exploded pork roast or the birthday cake that caught fire, setting off the alarm. No ..they were dangerous and dumb ..this was just dumb...with a capital "D".

*SIGH-H-H-H!!*

I began writing a post about the Top Ten Dumbest Mistakes I've made in the kitchen, but soon realized the pork post would be long enough as would some others written individually. I'll just stick with the turkey debacle for now.

So what did I do today?

I happily planned to cook a delicious Sunday meal of Roast turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes, turnips and carrots mashed together with salt, pepper, parsley and added butter (optional), green beans, cranberry sauce and biscuits. One of my favorites and perfect for the guys watching football. It's cold, dreary some hail and rain outside and the perfect day to be all cozy inside, doing your favorite things with the anticipation of a tasty meal.

It was a perfect plan ..really.

First I decided to bake some brownies. They don't take long and could bake while I was preparing the turkey and stuffing... which I did.

I had the neck and giblets simmering on the stove. I hate them (Liver? EWWW! Heart, GB and kidneys or are they lungs? GROSS! I can hardly look at them), and would never add to the stuffing ..but the water does flavor the gravy. The animals get the giblets and I save the neck for the turkey soup that will follow. MMM :) Although I suppose the neck would be better cooked fresh with the soup instead of double simmered. Someone once said that when you are making chicken soup to use to help heal a cold ..that you should always cook the neck with it and so I do with both chicken and turkey...but I digress.

The brownies were done and so I placed the turkey in the oven ... pleased with everything. After a couple of minutes, I glanced at the stove and saw that I didn't turn the heat down from 350 to 325 degrees and so quickly reduced the heat.

Then I went about some chores and read the Sunday paper. A couple of hours later... as I walked into the kitchen, I could faintly smell the turkey roasting. I looked over at the giblets and turned them down and then looked at the oven timer and walked away.

And then the realization moment hit and it was horrifying I tell you ..HORRIFYING from a cook's perspective who has told everyone what a great meal they were going to have for Sunday dinner and that included older son and his family too.

I had the potatoes out ready to peal and the turnip ready to chop... best laid plans.

I probably took about 4 steps because I remember where I was. I was just rounding the other side of the counter when it hit me that I didn't see the OVEN CONTROL LIGHT ON!!! Oh NO!!!

I turned and darted back over to the front of the stove...ever hopeful I just made a mistake because I wasn't wearing my glasses. The only red lights on were the ones for the burner and the flat top, indicating there was a hot burner. OH NO!!! The oven was definitely off and had been for about two hours!!!

I threw the oven door open, pulled out the rack, lifted the lid to the roasting pan ..and there it was ...much to my dismay ... a very pale ..barely warmed RAW turkey!!! And then ...as if my laying on of hands would somehow expedite the cooking process ...on a raw 13lb bird ...that had been sitting in an oven that was turned off for two hours .. I placed my hands all over the bird to try to gauge the level of cooking that had hopefully taken place. NOT MUCH at all. The bird was a comfortable lukewarm all over. Perfect if it was a comfy electric blanket to lie under... but not for tonight's dinner.

You HAVE to be KIDDING ME!!!" I exclaimed. Followed by "Mr SeaSpray ...we're NOT having turkey for dinner tonight!" Followed by more frustrated lamenting and whining (by me ..not son and husband), culminating in my calling d-i-l, telling her to forget dinner tonight..but we'll be having LEFT OVER turkey tomorrow night with all the fixings... and then my imagining my whopping myself all over with the raw stuffed turkey. (It's not easy to lift a stuffed 13lb bird over your head and duck at the same time ;)

They all took it better ..but I was (still am) seriously annoyed about it. UGH! It turns out that when I turned the temp down after baking the brownies... I neglected to hit start again. On our stove...anytime you change the temperature ..you have to finalize your choice by hitting start. I didn't and so it shut off.

The humor of this doesn't escape me though. Me on the sofa..contentedly reading the Sunday paper, next to Mr SeaSpray and son watching football ..expecting the wonderful aroma of the cooking turkey to be wafting around the house at any time. If SeaSpray was a cartoon character, as she got to the counter, having her moment of realization that the oven was NOT on... simultaneously ...her hair would've stood on end, her eyes would've popped widely, her ears would've bent sideways, her mouth would've widened as she shrieked and as she jumped mid air, her arms and legs would've extended outward! Don't mind me ..I'm still venting. :)

Fortunately ..after all the commotion ..I still remembered to actually turn the oven ON!

Anyway ..now the darn bird won't be done until 8:30 tonight, at which point ...I will have to make the gravy, etc. and I wanted to watch the 2 hour season opener to "24". Thank God for TiVo! :)

Just a little while ago as I exited another room I exclaimed "Now THAT'S what a
kirking tooky should SMELL like!" What can I say? I'm just so tired after all the self turkey whopping ..even if only in my head. ;)

Actually, the year I was cooking my first turkey as a relative newly wed ...another co-worker asked me what I was doing for Thanksgiving and I proudly announced that I was going to
Kirk a tooky. Ahh ..some things never change... even if it is 33 years later. :)

*Blogging really does facilitate the venting of one's feelings.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Birthday Revenge - Part IV and V (includes I, II, and III links)


Birthday revenge by you.
Birthday revenge by you.

The board/birthday sign was at least twice the size of what is shown and pretty high. The pictures don't do it justice. The flashing lights were bright! :)

Birthday Revenge - Part IV

This is the final post in the birthday revenge set. This post will be about my birthday revenge surprise for one of my dear friends ..Debbie, aka Pstamper. Her 40th birthday was 5 months after mine. I must admit that I was very much looking forward to payback. :)

Here is what caused me to go all out after Birthday Revenge Part-I and Birthday Revenge Part II and III if you would like to read from the beginning... to see why I so very much was looking forward to a little pay back. :)

I began my little project the week before her birthday. On the last night I worked in registration that week, I asked the ER staff if they could please make a banner for me because they had the printer paper.

"WILD PARTY TONIGHT! COME ONE, COME ALL! FAVORS FREE!!!" with a picture of Tango dancers at the end. :)

Then on Saturday night, I went down to a local store called Rockaway Sales. It was a small store that had a little of everything and everything I wanted that night for my little plan.

I bought a paint brush, black paint, nails and a 100 light strand of white Christmas lights. :)

Later that night, after Mr SeaSpray and younger son went to bed (older son wasn't home) ... I went out to the shed to find the big wooden board that I knew we had. I waited until Mr SeaSpray went to bed because I didn't want him to tell me I shouldn't do it.

I knew he knew all about their pranks on me and that he heard me talk about doing *something* for pay back for Debbie's upcoming 40th birthday ... but I also knew that if he saw me come in with the board, a hammer, nails, paint and paintbrush and that the prank involved electricity..he would not have thought it was a good idea. And ..I knew that once he saw the completed project coupled with my enthusiasm ..he'd acquiesce ... knowing I was determined to see it through in all it's glory and in good fun ..of course.. :)

So, I carried the board and supplies into the house. I moved the chairs around the table out of the way and placed the board on top of the table. I began painting the birthday message on the board. You can plainly see from these pictures that art is not my strong suit. I made a whole bunch of mistakes while painting. Hence the letters and their placement look just a bit weird. :)
Birthday revenge by you.

HAPPY 43RD
BirTHDAY
DEBBIE GiESER!


She was really turning 40 and so now with the "43", the neighbors could think *she* was 3 years older than she really was ...and think she looks great for her age. (She does :)

I also played around with her name and turned it into something to infer "GEEZER" although she certainly wasn't an elderly man. :)

But now looking at that picture it looks like GiESHA and someone driving by might've thought GEISHA...as in Geisha Girl!

Birthday revenge

Put GiEsha together with the computer sign and one might have thought Geisha favors!!! LOL!!! Up close you can see GiESER ends in "ER" but maybe not when driving by. Hahahahaha!

I don't know why, but I do like to hammer nails and so I enjoyed hammering every nail in ..all the way around the board. And I was quite pleased with how it was evolving. Heh heh. :) There were a lot of nails and I was afraid Mr SeaSpray would hear the noise and wake up, but he didn't. I got a bit over zealous and hammered one nail into the new table ..but not too badly. I eased up after that and was careful to pull the board over the edge of the table.

After the nails were in ..it was time for the best part ...the white Christmas lights! I ran the string of lights all the way around the board, weaving them in between the nails to hook them to the board. I set the lights to twinkle mode so they'd light up like a Vegas show sign. I plugged them in and turned the lights out.

PERFECT!! This would attract attention to the sign, I LOVED it and could hardly wait to carry out my plan. :)
**********************************************************
Birthday Revenge - Part V

I don't remember if I set it up on the following Monday or Tuesday night. But at that time, Debbie was working part time in the same hospital I worked at and since she was in my department..I knew her hours and I knew she would get out at 7pm that night.

Mr SeaSpray ended up being my accomplice in crime because he had to find all the heavy duty power cords for me, but that's as far as he went. I did all the hooking up.

But first I went to talk with Debbie's husband. I thought I should tell him what I was doing so he wouldn't be surprised if he saw me setting these things at up the end of his yard. I also asked him if I could put an additional sign (ER nurse made it for me) up on their garage window so that her lights would shine on it when she pulled into the driveway. I think it said Surprise and Happy Birthday! ..but not sure exactly. He gave me permission. :)

So I went back home and walked all the way back with the big board. I went back, plugged the power cords into a power source at our house and then ran the cords down to her property. Then I went back home and grabbed 2 chairs to place with the sign ..and I went home again to get the pack of ENSURE and my video camera. In retrospect it would've been better to drive the stuff over instead of doing all the back and forth.
I just knew she'd appreciate the ensure for a birthday gift! After all ..she was simply delighted to not only conspire and work with neighbors and husband to put the over the hill banner and balloons on our fence..but then to personally deliver an "over the hill" mug and geriatric type coupons the next morning. LOL! ;)

I plugged the lights in and they lit up in the dark fabulously! A definite attention getter. :) I then leaned the sign against the chair and then strung up the banner... attaching it to both the tree and the sign. Then I set up the other chair and placed that closer to the road and placed the ensure on top of that so she could see it easily when she turned into her road.

I positioned the sign just right to maximize it's visibility and it was *VISIBLE*... most definitely VISIBLE. The lights were a nice touch. :)

So now it was time to hide and I chose to hide across the street in the middle of my neighbor's evergreen tree. It was the perfect camouflage ...although somewhat prickly. And it was a very cold night ...and windy. It felt like the cold was whipping right through me and my hands were cold because I didn't think to bring any gloves. But I had a hood to put up and being inside the tree helped to block the chilling wind. It was the perfect spot because I could catch her coming down the road and in her driveway and with zoom ..it was perfect. It's great when a plan comes together. :)

What was was not perfect ..is that I assumed she would be home by a certain time. I knew how long it takes to get home and planned accordingly ... but I didn't allow for stopping off somewhere or anything that might detain her. So, it felt like I was in the tree for a long time and I was getting really cold. At least I had the tree surrounding me..blocking the worst of the wind chill.

And then the moment arrived..she was driving down the road toward her house. I turned the camera on and captured her drive down the road. LOL! The closer she got to her property ..the more she slowed down... until she was just creeping forward with her car. Then she stopped midway as she turned into her road. Just stopped. Her car was halfway on one road and halfway on another road and now it wasn't moving.

I continued filming.

I wondered what she was doing. I figured she was processing what she was seeing and possibly afraid to go home, into her house. After a couple of minutes, she continued on her road and pulled into the driveway.

I continued filming.

She sat in her car.

I continued filming.

Then finally ..she opened the car door and got out ...but she just stood in her driveway with her legs apart, facing her garage. She didn't move.

I could easily see her because the spotlight was shining down on her as she just stood there looking at the sign on the garage window. She looked so cute!

I wondered what she was thinking and thought that she might have been wondering what was going on in her house and was perhaps afraid to go in. At that point ..I just couldn't contain my laughter and exploded with laughter from inside the tree ...across the street behind her. She turned around and I got out of the tree and walked over to her ..laughing the entire walk over to her.

I don't remember all of what she said, but she was a good sport about it and I imagine relieved it was just me... being the prankster. :) We walked back out to the lights and looked at it all again. She did say that when she first turned onto the road, that from the other end it looked like a fire. Then she thought maybe her husband put up some kind of Christmas lights and she wondered if he lost his mind. LOL!

Anyway, for 3 more nights... like clockwork, I turned the lights to her birthday sign on.. as if they were Christmas lights and I left them on pretty late. I've always loved Christmas lights. :)

She was definitely a good sport about that. :)

Also... it never occurred to me that running a power cord on a road, across a road might not be the safest thing to do ..you know ..where cars drive over it. Is that some sort of zoning or electrical violation? Even the cops never interfered. They had to have seen it because they drive down our roads all the time and at that time there were 3 that lived in the area.

Ahhh ... I ask you ...what are friends for if not to taunt and tease you every now and then? ;)

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Birthday Revenge Pt II and Pt III



Birthday Revenge - Part II


The first part of this little birthday revenge series was about my decorating with black balloons and streamers for Mr SeaSpray's 40th birthday.. but it backfired because no one seemed to think it was funny. And my neighbor and dear friend thought it was so awful that I would do such a thing (can't help it ..but that still makes me laugh :) and she threatened me with putting tombstones all over our yard on my 40th birthday. That threat amused me greatly and I imagined the fun I'd have in retaliating with tombstones all over her yard. You know ..that whole payback is a biatch thing. I'd never have thought of tombstones but she did threaten me with them. :)

Well ... I was only 36 on Mr SeaSpray's 40th birthday. I was turning 35 that coming June.

So I had 4 years and 3 months before she'd get the opportunity to teach me a lesson... or so I thought.

Donna didn't waste anytime.

First of all .. I am amused that she thought about it for 3 months. She evidently decided she wouldn't wait 4 years and 3 months until my 40th birthday. Oh no. Donna decided she would make it my 40th birthday on my 36th birthday! Not only that ...but she saw to it that all the neighbors that didn't know me well would also think it was my 40th birthday ..when I was only turning 36. She aged me by four years. Who was cruel now? ;)

It was the evening of my THIRTY SIXTH birthday and I was waiting for family to come over. I was in the kitchen getting food ready. I walked over to the sink and just happened to look up and to my great surprise as I looked out the window toward the road... what did I see ???

DONNA!

I was surprised and thought "What is she up to? This is the pay back." Then I began to chuckle as I watched her for a minute.

She had put up a long strip of brown butcher block paper along our fence rails. I don't remember exactly (have pictures somewhere), but I think it was the length of 2 long rails ..about 20 feet all total. I think it is 10 feet between the posts. There she was crouched down with a bucket of red paint beside her. She was busily painting with a four inch paint brush, which is pretty broad when used for painting words.

I couldn't stand it. I had to see what she was doing and so I bolted out the door to check it out. I cracked up! She laughed too but was disappointed I saw it before she was done. So I said I'd look later as I was getting ready for company. I was thoroughly amused. I was also thinking about how I would get back at her..but her birthday wasn't for another10 months. :)

Then when J's family arrived... I noticed they had stopped and were staring at the fence. They weren't laughing. But as I already said ..they are very quiet in nature. I was wondering what she wrote though since I had only seen part of it.

So I walked out to them and said that Donna was playing a joke on me.

LOL! In bright red letters painted with a 4inch brush on brown butcher block paper, about 10 or 20 feet long ..it said:

HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY SEASPRAY! FREE FAVORS INSIDE!

I could've fallen on the street laughing but instead escorted bewildered family inside. I explained it was payback for the black balloons and she didn't like that I did that with Mr SeaSpray.

My mother knew Donna well and did get a chuckle out of it.

The "FREE FAVORS" thing was hilarious since that could've been taken another way and I know that is exactly how she meant it. :)

I left it up for a few days. :)

Ha! I wonder if the neighbors really do think I am 4 years older than I am? Well then maybe they think I look good for my age. ;)

If I ever find the pictures ..I will put them up. :)

I never did get back at her because she had something very sad happen in her life later that year, and the last thing I would've wanted to do was add anything to it. But oh boy..if that didn't happen .. she would've woken up to tombstones here..tombstones there ..tombstones, tombstones everywhere...AND black streamers and balloons... AND anything else I could think of. :)
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Birthday Revenge - Part III

Now you'd think that was enough for her ..that she got back at me... but oh no ..not at all. And this time ...she enlisted the help of Pstamper and her husband! :)

This time it was my 40th birthday and the day of older son's graduation party. We had a big barbecue for him that day with friends and family. I don't recall why ..but my car was parked out front.

Later that night ..around 10 pm or so ... I decided to go get the car and park it back in the driveway. So as I got closer to the car ...I heard something and saw some scurrying of some sort and when I got up close..it was just Donna and Passionstamper's husband ...Mr Passionstamper.

I might not have thought much about it ..but they were acting all weird. I don't recall exactly, but they were fumbling for why they were out there together ..ALONE...in the dark in front of our fence. Donna said something like "We were taking a WALK together! We just happened to run in to each other out here and decided to take a WALK!" In my mind all she had to do was add "yeah that's it ..yeah ..yeah that's it! we were taking a WALK together!", and then I really would've believed her...NOT.

I quickly concluded it was one of two possibilities... either they were having an affair and our fence was the rendezvous point ..or Donna was up to her shenanigans again and they are doing something to my fence again ..this time for my real 40th birthday. I knew it had to be the latter. And I thought I had seen someone else dart out of the way.

So ...I pretended I didn't know what they were up too, got the car and went back inside. but then around 1am, I couldn't stand it any more and even though everyone was sleeping .. I grabbed a flashlight and went out to look at it.

They had put up a long black and silver "Over the Hill" banner on the fence. I don't recall what else..I think some balloons. I took pics the next day and will show them sometime too. :)

Mrs Passionstamper was in on it too and she was on a roll. The next morning she came over to give me my birthday gifts. She stamped an "over the hill" mug and gave me a bunch of geriatric type coupons she had cut out just for the occasion. For ensure, dentures, depends ,etc. LOL!

I left the banner on the fence for a few days. Maybe some of those neighbors that were thinking I was 4 years older now thought I was 4 years younger ..my real age. oh wait ..only if the banner or something on the fence said 40th birthday. Ha ha! Or else they then thought I was 44! LOL!

As fate would have it ..the next 40th birthday to be celebrated was Pstampers... 5 months later. Heh ..heh.. and it would be PAY BACK time!! :)

And so Part IV will be about the birthday revenge ..um ...surprise I set up for Pstamper on her 40th birthday. I will put the other picture up with that post. Even filmed it.

Friday, January 1, 2010

2010

http://www.freeimageslive.co.uk/files/images003/2010newyear_colour.preview.jpg

Wow ...January, 2010.

I've been wanting to write that ...2010.

I don't know why.

I had a nice invite to a dear friend's house, but am just feeling out of sorts with this ureteral stent. (I'm in the home stretch though and it will be coming out in a couple of weeks.) She was even making a homemade cheesecake ...mmmm.

Instead ... we had a quiet night at home.

Okay, back to 2010.

Wait. I'm craving eggnog. I'll be right back.

Darn!

That was disappointing. I really wanted more of that.

The date on the artificial eggnog that smelled like 80 proof that I was so very much craving with an added dash of nutmeg had a "sell by December 30th " date. Ever hopeful and really wanting that eggnog, I popped the cap to smell it. Not so sure about it as I thought under that 80 proof whiskey/eggnog scent ... I detected just a hint of old dairy smell.

I did open it before Christmas. You would think that it had a gazillion preservatives in this 80 proof whiskey smelling eggnog that I now really, really wanted to sip with a dash of nutmeg in a pretty glass that used to belong to Grandma MacDonald... and I wanted to sip it here while relaxing as I blog. But salt was the only preservative. And it was the 15th listed ingredient. I believe it has to be withing the first five ingredients to matter... with one being the most.

I pondered whether or not natural flavoring (no doubt the 80 proof whiskey aroma), would be a preservative, which I doubted. Actually... it didn't have the word preservative anywhere on the bottle. But I did see eggs and milk. Not worth risking New Year's day over.

Hence I am now sipping on some sleepy herb tea with milk in a pretty Christmas mug. I wasn't sure if I should add milk to something that has citrus in it, but I really wanted something soothing and so decided to live on the wild side and thus added the milk. Nothing curdled, it tastes good and so here I am.

Now back to 2010.

Like I said ..I have been anxious to write 2010. I thought about it on and off all day.

Nothing stopped me.

I could've written 2010 on paper or in the snow today, or on the steamy bathroom mirror, on paper or in the snow tonight. 2010.

But not like that.

For some reason.. my strongest urge is to write it on paper ... but only after it turned 2010 and for a real reason ... not just to write 2010.

So Mr SeaSpray and I watched 2 movies tonight. I think the first one was a remake of an old Western "On the road or maybe on the train to Yuma" Sorry ..never did catch the title..just know they wanted to get to Yuma. It was a good movie and recommend it if you haven't seen it yet.

The other one I've had for a couple of years but we just never watched it. "The Pursuit of Happiness" ... an inspiring movie about a man (Will Smith) who never stops believing in himself, never gives up, maintains a positive attitude and loves and sticks with his young son - hoping to make a better life for them ..overcoming great adversity .. he keeps rising up after getting one hard knock after another. Truly an example of never giving up. It's based on a true story and at the end you find out what happened in real life from where the movie ends.

Our family room was cozy with the Christmas tree aglow with white lights and the candles in the window and other white lights in the room. I put the outside light on in the back so we could also watch the falling snow.

Younger son and his friend Mike were here briefly and watched a portion of the Yuma movie ..but then left to go to a party. I miss the times the kids thought it was a big deal to bang on pots at midnight ...many moons ago. :)

So there I was all cozy with Mr SeaSpray ..all cozy, just enjoying the movies and appreciating the falling snow... when I thought about writing 2010 again... and did so several times. So weird.

I don't know what it is about 2010. Not even my favorite numbers. 5 is my favorite number... then 1,3 or 8 ... but I digress.

So, the way I figure it..I won't be able to write 2010 until Wednesday - January 6, 2010. That is because I will be writing a check during an appointment I have. That will be my first official reason to wright the year ..2010.

I even like the way it looks... 2010.

I was hopeful about 2008. 8 is the Biblical number for new beginnings and I was anticipating a good year. But I had a slight relapse with urology issue and mom took ill and declined. Then she died in April, 2009.

However ... in May, 2009 ...we were all blessed with beautiful and precious Wrenna's birth into our family.

But then there are other concerns that I am not writing about, but am praying for. I feel powerless and the only thing I can do is pray.

So... this 2010 thing ... I am thinking it is my desire for new beginnings .. a new decade bringing hope for better things to come.

If you know nothing else about me on Wednesday ... you know that I have an appointment and I will be writing a check dated for January 6, 2010.

So in keeping with this inane wealth of information I am sharing, I might as well tell you that I also like to write the months January and November as well as the word pharmacy. This is because I don't have good penmanship and for some reason I write those words really well.

Is this just me? Does anyone else like the idea of writing the year of 2010?

Well ..that's all I have to say about that. :)

May 2010 be a year filled with love, joy, peace, good health, prosperity and great blessing for all.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! :)

P.S. I just checked out my sidebar ..where the posts are listed for the year to see what 2010 looks like. 2010 really stands out to me. Why is that? 2010 is really grabbing my attention. ? :)

*My next post will be "Birthday Revenge - Part II"