Sunday, April 22, 2012

Medical Chart Humor - Happy Sunday! :)

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ACTUAL SENTENCES FOUND IN PATIENT'S MEDICAL CHARTS at PHILIPPINE GENERAL
HOSPITAL:

1. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
2. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it
disappeared.
3. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very
hot in bed last night.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be
depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began Seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
7. The patient refused autopsy.
8. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
9. She is numb from her toes down.
10. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
11. The skin was moist and dry.
12. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
13. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
14. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
15. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until
she got a divorce.
16. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
17. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a
stockbroker instead.
18. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
19. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

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