Monday, May 25, 2015
I just want to say thank you to all veterans ...veterans past and to the veterans currently serving. I don't have words adequate enough that could ever convey the gratitude I feel for the sacrifices you have made ...and for too many , it has been the ultimate sacrifice - dying or incurring severe injuries and/or emotional traumas. You've given up so much so that we can remain safe and free.
With all my heart I say ...Thank YOU.
Blessings to you and your families - always.
Okay ...I'm not obsessive. I'm not Obsessive. I'm not obsessive.
Just because I had to force myself into the shower after midnight - actually 12:33 to be exact. And I was so tired.
I blame it on the bed sheets. It's their fault they are so clean, crisp, and newly placed on our bed. Well ...alright ...I put them on the bed.. And ...I have this thing that I like being freshly showered after putting clean sheets on the bed. It just feels s-o-o-o good. :)
But ...I'm not totally obsessive about it because even if I have a morning shower I will sleep on clean sheets. It's just that my favorite way is with an evening shower on clean sheet day. But not after midnight.
So ...you ask ...why did you shower so late?
Because I was really busy doing things around the house today and then I knew I had to go up in the attic to find an MIA summer clothing bag after younger son declared that there weren't anymore summer clothes bags up there. Of course I knew he was wrong ...just like I knew the Christmas lights were indeed up there. And we have great drop down stairs but with knee pain and my phobia ...I really have to be in the mood to go up there. It was pure determination that motivated me to go up there tonight. And sure enough ...I found the bag. It was the big bag black with the white paper ducked taped to it that on blue marker, said "Summer clothes 2015" and that it was exactly where I keep the seasonal clothes.
Anyway ...I didn't want to go up into the attic when I should have because I wanted to listen to Aaron Klein on streaming radio between 7-9. He is only on on Sunday nights and I totally respect and appreciate his reporting. If only the news outlets and other journalists did investigative reporting like he does. And I include FOX in that mix. But I digress.
Unfortunately for me ... I s-o-o-o was not in the mood to go up there and so I stalled until about 11:30 pm. And that was stupid because I was just prolonging the inevitable.
Then ...with the attic mission accomplished I decided I would just do a fast, get-it-over-with shower. But for some reason I decided I didn't want to shower with the lights on, but instead by the low light of these little battery operated stars I placed in a glass vase with shells and beachy things that I put together. The star light reminds me of moonlight. After all ...if I had to shower this late, then moonlight was more relaxing ...even if I couldn't see as well.
However, once in the shower I decided to take a spa shower using my favorite spa products for my hair and body. And I just love rinsing my hair with what I think of as a waterfall spray. Which was okay in the moonlight type light. Of course I also decided since I was all in with this that I might as well shave but this light was not conducive to it.
Basically I shaved by braille. What could go wrong? Fortunately I didn't end up with psycho tub. ;)
After getting out of the shower I wrapped my hair in a big towel. Then, to my utter dismay I saw that when I put the clean towels up I didn't put my hair towel up and so now I had used my bath towel for my hair. What to do? What to do? I put the light on and because the laundry had gotten backed up from when I was ill last week, the only towels left in the closet were some hand towels. Great. So I dried myself with a hand towel.
Shower mission accomplished, I opted to sit here and write this post because I can't go to bed with wet hair. Well I could ...but would rather not. And I avoid using hair dryers and curling irons on my hair so it will stay soft and shiny. What we women do! I always say this but men have it so easy. Shave - don't shave - they can do what they want. They don't fuss with makeup and hair. Well okay maybe hair. But basically as they get older with grey hair or lines, they just get distinguished. Women can get haggard if they don't take care of themselves. It's s-o-o-o not fair! Just saying. :)
I'd rather watch TV but I know that if I do, I will eat things I don't want to eat because I am hungry.
I have found typing to be non caloric and so I am really trying to just air dry my hair here. ;) And I absolutely know that I will weigh less tomorrow if I don't eat so late because I have been trying and also have been active. I have goals that I've set and I really want to succeed.
Oh no! It seems that my dog is passing gas behind me or there is a skunk just outside and the smell is wafting in through the a/c vents. Ugh! ANOTHER non caloric appetite suppressant!
And on that note - good night!
P.S. And now I really am happy that I will be all silky soft and clean on the new sheets. It feels so good and is so relaxing. :) The only thing that could make the experience any better would be if the sheets had been line dried. The scent of line dried sheets is the best.
Hmmm... now I want line dried sheets. I'm kidding!
P.P.S. Oh yeah ...I never did write about my one phobia (or did I?) ...genuine ...although I'm not sure if there are degrees to it. I will have to check my posts.
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
I was on my way to a pharmacy a few towns away to pick up a medication for Mr SeaSpray and Amoxicillin for this wicked throat infection that I have. Amoxicillin - YAY! However as I entered into the next town I noticed the car battery light on. Uh oh. This can't be good but if I just keep the car running I should be okay. Right?
Fortunately I decided to pull over to read the car manual recommendations. Darn! This isn't good. But I only have to go about 5 more miles and then 9 back. What could go wrong?
I REALLY wanted that Amoxicillin!
But then I imagined myself with a dead battery on the side of the road and despite the lure of the greatly desired amoxicilllin, I headed back. But first I pulled into our new mechanic's lot and he came right out. He tested the alternator. We need a new alternator. The car was only running on the battery and so I shut everything off that drains the battery and headed back home.
I did what I always do when I come home in the afternoon. I pulled up alongside our fence to get the mail. Then after I stopped the car in the driveway I did the 2nd thing I always do ...I began looking at the mail before getting out of the car. But after lifting a second envelope something goldish brown dropped down into my crotch area and I began to scream because I thought it was a spider and I hate and am afraid of spiders. *SHUDDER*
But then it began buzzing and I began screaming more. Do bees hear the screaming? I wasn't sure if it was going to go up my blouse or where it was and my instinct was to swat it away but that could also provoke it even more and I really did not want a bee sting. Still screaming I couldn't get out of the car fast enough. The bee followed but fortunately flew away.
This actually worked out well. True ...we need a new alternator and I didn't get the Amoxicillin, but at least I didn't get stung by that bee. And even more important ...if the alternator was going to die then I am glad it was today and not on Friday when I will be driving farther away from home on much busier roads down in another county.
Monday, May 18, 2015
I'm not usually so negative but have felt challenged in the hope department lately. The verse above is one of my favorites and I need to be mindful that God is bigger than any problems. It doesn't mean people won't go through awful things. Bad things do happen to good people. But he does promise to be with us always. Speaking for myself ...I always feel better about life when I focus on the promises of God and his love. Fear is the opposite of faith. I choose faith. Photo credit.
I think I made a mistake in not going to the doctor today as I think I may have strep. Or is it possible to have such a bad sore throat, swollen glands and aching ears and opting to drool at times versus swallowing and still not have strep? I didn't feel like showering and getting my achy ears wet, but will I really feel more like it tomorrow? And I am NOT going to the ER. Oh well.
Anyway ...I have really been wanting to blog except that I have had this awful block with writing ...or ...I write but then keep it in drafts ...or I post and just as quickly take it back down. I don't know what is wrong with me regarding writing ...a hobby that I have been passionate about in the past. I am disappointed that some bloggers no longer blog. But others still do. And that isn't why I haven't been writing. Just an observation. And I miss the ones that have stopped. Also, I know many have gravitated to fb and I am just not big on facebook. Or twitter. I'm a blogging purist. I just love writing and reading what other bloggers have written. But ...I've also been remiss in reading too. As a matter of fact ...I've been remiss with keeping up with email too. Again ...I don't know why. it almost feels draining to expend the energy. Is that depression? Because I don't feel depressed. I have used the "O" word a lot this past winter and spring. Overwhelmed.
I have been watching TV although not as many news shows as I used to. They all end up saying the same things anyway. If I do watch ...my favorite television news shows would be The Five and Megyn Kelley on FOX. I don't always agree with them but do think they are fair. I'd love to hang out with the Five crew. :) I also want to get Dana Perino's book, "And the Good News is ...Lessons and Advice from the Bright Side." I hear it is a number one seller and people from both parties are enjoying it. I've heard it's a good read, positive and great book to give to a young person starting out. Who doesn't need some good news and encouragement these days?
I don't know ...life just seems weird these days. I wonder if anyone else feels this way? I've had some personal reasons that caused me to feel overwhelmed but most of that is resolved now.
I also really like Judge Jeannine's show on Saturday nights and appreciate how she tells it like it is and does not mince words. If it weren't for her I wouldn't know about the danger that we are all in regarding an EMP attack or solar flares taking the grid down. BTW ...if that happened (God Forbid!) we would all be catapulted back to the 1800s. Also 90% of the population would be dead in a year. I cannot understand why our government has not moved on fixing this problem. It baffles the mind - seriously. The last I knew ...the UK, Russia, Israel and I think N Korea have protected their grids. How is it that the United States has not fixed this yet? They say it is not expensive to fix.
Anyway ...I have been watching TV, with sitcoms being my favorite. (Mash, Frasier and Everybody Loves Raymond :) I just want to laugh. It's an escape. I've also been reading a lot. I'm currently and thoroughly enjoying reading, "Les Miserables" and am glad I decided to read it first before watching the movie.
And I am making more time to listen to music ...which at this point feels like a respite for my soul.
I guess this news junkie, SeaSpray, has been needing to escape from the reality of what is going on in this country and abroad. It is awful beyond words. :( I do listen to political pod casts and talk radio. I don't think the talking heads on TV give you all the facts ...not even FOX. I think the masses are asleep. Some just don't pay attention or care and assume life is the same old, same old. It's not. And then those that do pay attention are not getting all the information in the MSM. I 100% believe if they knew the truth about certain things that they would be concerned.
And I am not saying these things to be political. I think many things are beyond being partisan and should be a concern to Americans regardless of ideologies. How can one make accurate judgements if the facts are withheld? For example ...why aren't all the news stations ...including FOX shouting from the rooftops every day about protecting us from the grid going down? That is a huge concern. It is also known that the Chinese and Russians already have internal access to our electrical grids. I just do not understand why we are still so vulnerable when it is a relatively easy and inexpensive fix as compared to other national concerns.
Then there is the fact that this administration is allowing thousands of people to come into this country illegally and without vetting them. Our national security is being greatly compromised by allowing this to happen. I can't even get into this right now.
Okay ...I did write much more but will save it for another time.
I just can't believe all the bad and at times alarming news everywhere.
And I know that I am not the only one to feel great concern.
I have really felt powerless.
If our elected leaders won't fix things what chance do we have of effecting positive change?
I've always been the eternal optimist type. Not so much anymore when it comes to how our government is managing things. I think corruption runs deep within both parties. It's like what was once considered right is wrong and what was wrong is now right. I've heard a lot of people say this even in the news.
I cannot believe all the things I keep deleting because I feel afraid to speak my own mind about some topics. This is so not me. But now it is. If anyone would've told me I would feel like this in the United States I wouldn't have believed it. And there is so MUCH that is wrong that I don't even know where to begin. And does it matter anyway? To quote a former Secretary of State, "What DIFFERENCE does it make?"
And while the people slept....
Friday, May 15, 2015
I know this feeling. :) Photo credit
Monday night, I finally got in to see my urologist after delaying for various reasons since this past November. I've cancelled SIX appointments since then and that is not at all the norm for me. Admittedly since March ...I have been afraid to go in because I thought he might use the "C" word. But that was for yesterday's appointment. The first five cancellations were due to illnesses or family emergencies. I wasn't overly concerned because it was to be a follow-up appointment for the renal scan I had had last year and I knew the test results were normal.
Anyway, back to that "C" word. This past March I had a urinary tract infection with significant renal colic in my right kidney. I endured really strong kidney spasm's (at worst up to about a 8 and 2/5 on the pain scale. (lq2m) I'm just messing with medical people with the 2/5. ;) that began in early evening and lasted into the wee hours of the morning until I fell asleep. Luckily for me I had percocet left over and was able to take that to help with the pain. I also packed a bag for the hospital ...just in case. A SeaSpray's gotta be prepared. :) Fortunately the worst pain was gone by morning. Given what my past urologic history has been (although resolved since March 2011), it is something to follow up on. The following morning when said urologist called to check up on me from the night before, he mentioned the "C" word and I agreed ...but since then have been avoiding. The "C" word being cystoscopy ...although the other night, I think he said cystogram. Whatever. They're both "C" words. Oh ...and he used the "R" word too - retrograde.
I'm not afraid of the procedure. Although, I would be if I knew it was being done in the office. But I feel a bit squirrely about it ...sort of ..well ..okay ..fine ..I do ...feel squirrelly about it ...BECAUSE ...well because ...I don't want to wake up to a stent in me. Then I would be very concerned I had gone backwards from being healed. And so if I don't do the test then I can't go backwards. And I know that is flawed reasoning because if something is wrong you want to head it off before you are at more risk and then playing catch up. I do know better.
In the past there were other UTIs, some with renal colic and some without and they went away with antibiotics, but then it turned out that I had that ureteral stricture. But that was before I had ever been stented. Well ...okay there was one time after being stented that the URI was the warning and that went into renal colic as well, but I also had the stricture. Another time - no UTI but just renal colic. I did wrestle with this chronic condition. BUT it all stopped after I finished up with the last stent ...a BIG stent that was in me for 11 weeks. Thank God my urologist worked with me. And now I have been stent free for FOUR years and 2 months. It simply doesn't make sense that my ureter would close up again. Right?
So using that logic, then I really should not be concerned about the "C" word.
My urologist did use the "C" word last night, but is having me repeat the mag III renal scan w/lasix first and earlier than I would normally have to. Then he will decide after that. I appreciate his encouraging me. And I am a person of faith and I need to be more trusting that everything really is just fine. Actually I do. I just have this part of me that does this for whatever reason. And obviously ...now that I have finally gone in I will follow through with whatever I need to do. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. And so I will.
And there WILL be a good outcome. :)