Saturday, May 14, 2016
Some Friday Night Thoughts
1. But for the grace of God, says me ...I am still alive. And haven't stroked out. I found out today, from a cardiologist who wasn't my doctor that I have been taking a dangerous medication for hypertension and have been using it wrong for TWELVE years. The wrong is my fault not the doctors who prescribed it. I was only there because I was accompanying someone else at their appointment. And when that was over, I told him about my crazy blood pressure that I had a few days ago. In about 12 hours time I went from hypertension crisis to hypotension and then finally back to normal by the end of the day. So all I wanted to know from him was should I see him, the specialist directly or should I see my PCP? I told him I don't need referrals. When he heard the medication and the numbers he told me he wanted me to check in right now and he would see me. So I did. And he did. I will finish this post another time to explain what happened and what I have to do now.
2. So ...I was on my way down to the mall to return something around 7:30ish tonight, when I realized that I had been the only one on this pretty busy 2 lane highway ...for miles. It is true that it was after rush hour and traffic would build up traveling in the opposite direction. But it was a Friday night. And this is NJ. I was heading down to a more congested area. It was great. I was just sailing on through all the lights. You know ...that feeling you get when you're just breezing a long with the music ...where you feel like you are one with the road? Neat feeling. :)
Then I had this thought ...what if the rapture happened? What if I was left behind? And then I came to a stop at a light closer to the mall and tons of cars were crossing out onto the highway and a bunch of cars pulled up behind me. Maybe I was just leading the pack. Although ...maybe ... ;)
3. I was returning a pair of 70.00 black pants ...black dress pants that I had bought a month ago. They were very nice pants and looked nice on me but cost too much to keep and not wear. The fabric is a bit heavy for warm weather and I hope to be in an even smaller size by the end of the summer. We'll see. Anyway, I never took the tags off. You see I bought them smaller than I should have. But I had lost weight and I didn't want to buy the next size up because they were too baggy. I am tired of no one seeing that I have thinner legs than I did. I loved how these looked on me. The problem was I had to suck in my stomach really far to close them. But it worked.
Then I tried them on again at home and decided to lie down on the bed ...like I did in my teens and 20s when getting into tight jeans. :) I walked around a bit and then decided to sit in them. Because after all I would have to sit in them. And maybe I could break them in a bit. Of course losing another 5 lbs might make a difference too.
But after a couple of minutes I was beginning to feel a bit weird and dizzyish. So, I stood up and the feeling went away. I sat again and the weird and dizzyish sensations came back. And now that it is getting warmer I'm not likely to wear them anyway and so I might as well wait until until I am at least really down into the next size or more.
4. Then I did a stupid thing on the way home. I was famished because all I had all day was one cup of coffee with milk, a banana in late afternoon and a spoon of last night's lasagna before heading back out the door. I also hardly drank water and was thirsty before leaving but I hate public rest rooms and so I avoided that too. Well ...I did buy an organic peach tea. I love peach. It was okay. The thing is they shouldn't claim organic when they also have unlisted "natural" ingredients. Just saying.
Well the tea wasn't the bad thing. The bad thing is that I decided to stop at a Burger King as soon as I got off that highway on my way home. And here's the kicker. YUK! I don't know what came over me, but I ordered a Whopper hot dog. Did you just barf a little in your mouth? I feel like it now. DOUBLE YUK!!!
If I have a hotdog it has to be beef and kosher. I doubt these were. Yes they are beef. Kosher? Probably not. I was attracted to the Whopper Burger vegetables being on a hotdog. I LOVE vegetable sandwiches. But this was on a hotdog. I ate it but will never get it again. Needless to say it was not a Tuscany roasted vegetable and Balsamic vinegar sandwich on a ciabatta bread. I also got an order of fries with no salt. They tasted weird to me because I could taste the oil they were fried in.
Years ago when traveling during one of my jobs I'd stop at fast food places. No wonder I gained weight! I really cannot stand them now. I have to be desperate to go to one. Well ...except for an egg McMuffin with bacon and cheese. But I rarely have them either. I don't know. There is something about the grease or whatever they cook with that I just do-not-like. UGH!
Anyway it is now a couple of hours later and I drank a ton of water and still am (I just KNOW this is gonna be a... I wish I had a foley catheter ...kind of night) and I still feel like I can taste it. I am actually cringing at the thought of that Whopper hotdog. And that is what it is. Psychological Whopper dog revulsion ...because I really can't taste it. I just feel like I can. The memory of it just won't go away.
So ...I am thinking of having one of Mr SeaSpray's Eskimo bars. Chocolate might be just the thing to take the taste away. Seriously. And then to bed.
5. I am bringing my grandchildren to my friend Iris' youngest grandson's birthday party at 11 am in the morning. I wrote about Iris in 2011. She passed away from non smokers lung cancer in October of 2011. She just missed seeing her daughter's first son being born and this is her second son, who will be two years old. There are four grandchildren between her two children. She also never met her little granddaughter who looks like her and has her curly hair. Iris would be just crazy in love with all of these beautiful children. It is bittersweet for me to go up there. I will enjoy being with all of the family and while it is easier now after 4 1/2 years ...it still hurts. I just hide it better now. Sigh. But it will be a fun day too. :)